Which brings us to your more general task: neutralizing her insecurity by conveying that bigger is . That you don't feel like less of a man when you're with her. Some of it boils down to you owning a more classic masculinity—going in for the kiss first, deciding the dinner location, simply being more assertive.

But keep in mind that, because you're asking her to question gut-level beliefs about what she finds attractive, you need to be willing to broaden your own definition of what you find attractive—and convey to her that it does not contain the phrase "smaller than me."Of course, women also have to be willing to check their own biases about short men.

(Webb is five-six, making that requirement just one inch shy of the eight-percent average.) "I wanted someone to overpower me, who could wrap his entire body around me in a hug, but who could also throw me down on a bed and ravish me," she writes.

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This is essential to know—it's not just about shortness, but also skinniness.

To be bigger than men is to worry that you'll turn them off.

I consider short guys my natural allies and am constantly making the case to my female friends that they should stop fetishizing tall men. To go on even just one date with someone who falls outside of our eight-percent range, and to ask ourselves whether there's actually less chemistry there.

(When one friend narrowed her Ok Cupid search to men taller than six feet and then complained about a boring date with some guy built like an NBA player, I laughed in her face.) Here's how I figure it: If a man is comfortable with the fact that I'm taller, he's also likely to be comfortable with the fact that I'm competitive and outgoing and career-oriented. To think of a world with all these new, gorgeous options.

Q: What makes a man think about a dinner by candlelight?

A vulture waits until you're dead before ripping your heart out.

" If I'm feeling charitable, I answer honestly: "6-foot-2." They often follow-up with, "Do you ever date shorter men? And online, it's even more brutal: Women can calculate how tall they are in their highest heels, add a few inches for good measure, and then filter out men who fall below that sum.

The average woman is eight percent shorter than her male partner.

Webb found that it isn't just men lying about their height online, women do, too—to appear shorter. I've taken to giving my whiskey a single swirl, looking down my nose and saying slowly, "You are boring me. You would never walk up to a woman and open with, "What's your bra size?