So, for the uninitiated, the nervous or the miserable (or anyone who is none of the above), here are 16 flirting fails that will make your life look significantly more joyful.

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If you have feelings to share, pick up the phone or run the risk of sounding pathetic.

And just for good measure, don’t ever start a text with “We need to talk,” “I’ve been meaning to tell you,” or “So I went to the doctor…” Yes, we know the 8-megapixel camera on the i Phone may make her photos to you feel like your own personal Playboy, but overly sexual demands are a quick way to turn her from hot to cold.

But all of these apps rely fairly heavily on the profile pictures people use.

According to the research done by Christian Rudder, author of Our study would approach matching people up from a different, entirely personality-based angle.

Inability to set the pace will make or break your situation.

The rules to live by: one text at a time, take your time, and don’t answer her every text.

Whichever disastrous message outcome came from combining mistakes ten (wazup wher chi at) and three (send me a pic of that ass), chances are she can no longer take you seriously—or thinks you’re a pig.

If you can’t achieve straight up self-control, at least there’s an app for that.

The king of all texting fouls, “crack texting” —as Masters defines it—means sending multiple messages without any or equal response.

Frequency is the most powerful component in her view of you.

“It’s completely acceptable to sneak in the sexual as long as it is shrouded in humor,” says Masters.