I’m not telling you to do that cheesy thing that they do in sitcoms where you write out an actual pros and cons list and tally them up and the number you get at the end should be your indicator. He said two things out loud: He has great sex with Cece, and he dated Elizabeth first.

That’s not real, and all that’s doing is cheapening how you feel about the two people you’re in love with. He then decided that was all it took: Elizabeth was there first, so she gets him. If he had taken the time to think about all the things he loves about each of them, and all the things that drive him crazy about each of them, he might have actually realized naturally who he wants to be with.

- Natalie Clifford Barney- Sometimes what we call love is just a settling of old scores, or a seeking of forbidden pain, or a circuitous path to the kingdom of cruelty, or she may simply have confused lack of capital with heroism while searching for rescue without knowing from what.

Last week on “New Girl,” Schmidt had to choose between two awesome ladies, Cece and Elizabeth.

Honestly, these girls are such great characters in completely different ways, that it can be hard even as a viewer to decide who you want Schmidt to be with. These are not two girls he’s just been on a couple of dates with who don’t know if they’re exclusive yet.

These are two girls he’s previously had serious relationships with, who know about each other.

While this isn’t something that happens every day, there may come a time in your life when you do have to choose between two equally cool people, both of whom you could see yourself dating for many years.

It can feel like the biggest decision of your life.

Choose right, and you’ll be in a healthy, happy, long-lasting relationship.Because dating is hard, and with the festive season approaching you might be tempted to reach out to all sorts of toxic people. Red flags include: acting indifferently, refusing to make room in their life for you, being kind of rude, or doing odd or unexplained behaviours at you. I don’t know if you’ll be together when the inevitable robot war begins and you’ll get evaporated by lasers together. But also maybe they’re the worst and they’re gonna hurt your feelings and steal your VCR. Stop dating all the exact same person what are just dressed up in slightly different skin bags. So buckle up, celebrate your singularity and make the best of it.Being cautious when your heart is an enormous hopeful flesh bag is hard. Basically, if you spot anything that in the past has signalled something bad: Don’t ignore it. So practice slowing down, practice managing your expectations, and try to base your hopes on how they act in reality rather than in your most hopeful dreams. If you’ve only ever dated sad poem writing types, why not try dating a happy clam farmer or a folk singer? Don’t romanticize romance, remember that it’s worth waiting for something extraordinary, and then do just that.Or you’ll end up not really thinking about it and accidentally turning into a two-timing scumbag like Schmidt did last night. Take a spa day when the pressure is getting to you.Or, if you’re a Type A personality, keep working on that Pros and Cons list! One way to survive it is to look at patterns of behaviours and decisions that have led us into terrible places in the past and think “maybe let’s not do that this time’.